Knock Bush out!!!

Here's your chance to live out the fantasy of punching Bush right in his twang talkin' piehole (without the pain of being tackled & severely beaten by Secret Service agents of course!)

Click on picture to play!

Games Boxing W Bush President Idiot Red Blue Religious Right McBoozo

Bunny Suicides!

I had read about this book a long while back and I've wanted it ever since...just haven't ever gotten around to buying it yet. Anyway, I just ran across this site showing a large collection of these. Below are a few of my favorites, click any of the pictures to check them all out!

Bunny Suicide Cartoon Andy Riley Book McBoozo Grim Morbid Gruesome Evil

McBoozo's Mp3 Flashback...

Back again with another group of (4) random tracks for ya'll. Hope you enjoy'em! Remember, all you have to do is Right-Cick on a song title and then choose Save As...



and we'll get started with some Yardbirds!

Smokestack Lightning - The Yardbirds

The Yardbirds are mostly known to the casual rock fan as the starting point for three of the greatest British rock guitarists: Eric Clapton, Jeff Beck, and Jimmy Page. Undoubtedly, these three figures did much to shape the group's sound, but throughout their career, the Yardbirds were very much a unit, albeit a rather unstable one. And they were truly one of the great rock bands; one whose contributions went far beyond the scope of their half dozen or so mid-'60s hits.

In the beginning (1963) they were simply the best versed and the most faithful disciples of Chicago blues. They were the ones to replace the Rolling Stones in the blues clubs in the London neighborhood of Richmond when Jagger and Co. became stars. But the Yardbirds, unlike the Stones, had a clean sound and a more serious attitude, both professionally and personally. Nor were they like the the Animals, whose sound centered around the singer and the organ.The Yardbirds' focus on the the guitar was an exquisitely technical contribution to the evolution of rock style.

Prodigy Eric Clapton was at the guitar, and around his sound the rhythm guitar of Chris Dreja, the drums of Jim McCarty and the harmonica of the singer Keith Relf served as able collaborators. The structure of the band and their choice of repertoire got them close to black musicians. They secured a friendship with American bluesman Sonny Boy Williamson (Rice Miller), with whom they toured. After booking a long engagement at George Gomelsky's Crawdaddy Club, the band made their first recordings there, as Williamson's backup band, although those tracks were released some years later.

Their first record on their own was Five Live Yardbirds (1964), full of hyper-kinetic blues, which yielded them a discreet following in the United States. Most memorable are the skillful jams graced by Clapton's solos, in particular the one in Smokestack Lightning, with a spectacular call-and-response between guitar and harmonica.

Stay With Me - The Faces

When Steve Marriott left the Small Faces in 1969, the three remaining members brought in guitarist Ron Wood and lead singer Rod Stewart to complete the lineup and changed their name to the Faces, which was only appropriate since the group now only slightly resembled the mod-pop group of the past. Instead, the Faces were a rough, sloppy rock & roll band, able to pound out a rocker like "Had Me a Real Good Time," a blues ballad like "Tell Everyone," or a folk number like "Richmond" all in one album. Stewart, already becoming a star in his own right, let himself go wild with the Faces, tearing through covers and originals with abandon. While his voice didn't have the power of Stewart , bassist Ronnie Lane's songs were equally as impressive and eclectic. Wood's rhythm guitar had a warm, fat tone that was as influential and driving as Keith Richards' style. Notorious for their hard-partying, boozy tours and ragged concerts, the Faces lived the rock & roll lifestyle to the extreme.

The shambolic "Stay With Me" reflects the trashy rock & roll lifestyle it celebrates: Making a deal for a one-night stand with a woman with "red lips, hair and fingernails," who the singer has "found...down on the floor." After imploring her to spend the night, she is warned to be out of the bed by morning. Following a breakneck introduction (which also serves as the outro), a distorted Ian McLagen Wurlitzer electric piano transitions into a chugging Chuck Berry via Keith Richards guitar rhythm, played by Ron Wood followed by heavy-handed 2/4 Kenny Jones drums, a slide guitar lead, and ravaged vocals by a young Rod Stewart -- it has all the elements of a classic, raucous rock & roll number. It was well-received, hitting number 17 in America and number six in the U.K. "You won't need too much persuading/I don't mean to sound degrading/but with a face like that, you've got nothing to laugh about" -- the song is rave-up rock & roll as burlesque. The song is pure and simple fun. It is filled with short solo instrument breaks and stops before the band re-enters. Released at a time when rock & roll was becoming more complicated, it reflects another era when the music was supposed to make you dance, not think.

You Need Love - Willie Dixon

Willie Dixon's life and work was virtually an embodiment of the progress of the blues, from an accidental creation of the descendants of freed slaves to a recognized and vital part of America's musical heritage. That Dixon was one of the first professional blues songwriters to benefit in a serious, material way -- and that he had to fight to do it -- from his work also made him an important symbol of the injustice that still informs the music industry, even at the end of the 20th century. A producer, songwriter, bassist, and singer, he helped Muddy Waters, Howlin' Wolf, Little Walter, and others find their most commercially successful voices.

She's Nineteen - Muddy Waters

A postwar Chicago blues scene without the magnificent contributions of Muddy Waters is absolutely unimaginable. From the late '40s on, he eloquently defined the city's aggressive, swaggering, Delta-rooted sound with his declamatory vocals and piercing slide-guitar attack. When he passed away in 1983, the Windy City would never quite recover.

Like many of his contemporaries on the Chicago circuit, Waters was a product of the fertile Mississippi Delta. Born McKinley Morganfield in Rolling Fork, he grew up in nearby Clarksdale on Stovall's Plantation. His idol was the powerful Son House, a Delta patriarch whose flailing slide work and intimidating intensity Waters would emulate in his own fashion.

Musicologist Alan Lomax traveled through Stovall's in August of 1941 under the auspices of the Library of Congress, in search of new talent for purposes of field recording. With the discovery of Morganfield, Lomax must have immediately known he'd stumbled across someone very special.

Flashback Music MP3 60's Yardbirds Faces Willie Dixon Muddy Waters Blues Chicago Rod Stewart Clapton is God Rock McBoozo Led Zeppelin

Come Visit Bob's Cube!

Stop by and have a look around Bob's Cube!
I have no idea how long this has been around but I just came across it today and thought it was pretty funny. There are some great video's of office hijinks that are rather inspiring!

Office Work Cubicle Cube Humor Hijinks Peeps Pranks McBoozo Corporate

Latino's, Black's, and Caucasian's

This was from my buddy Tony. I thought it was pretty funny. Yeah.

10 TRUTHS BLACK AND LATIN PEOPLE KNOW, BUT WHITE PEOPLE WON'T ADMIT:

1. Elvis is dead.
2. Having your children curse you out in public is not normal.
3. Jesus was not White.
4. Skinny does not equal sexy.
5. A 5 year old child is too big for a stroller.
6. N' SYNC will never hold a candle to the Jackson 5.
7. Thomas Jefferson had black children.
8. An occasional BUTT whooping helps a child stay in line.
9. Kissing your pet is not cute.
10. Rap music is here to stay.

10 THINGS WHITE AND BLACK PEOPLE KNOW BUT LATIN PEOPLE DON'T ADMIT:

1. Chicken is food, not a roommate.
2. "Jump out and run" is not in any insurance policies.
3. Your country's flag is not a car decoration.
4. Hickey's are unattractive
5. Mami and Papi can't possibly be the nickname of every person in your family.
6. Buttoning just the top button of your shirt is a bad fashion statement.
7. 10 people to a car or home is considered too many.
8. Jesus is not a name for your son.
9. Maria is a name, but not for every other daughter.
10. Letting your children run wildly through the store can get your BUTT whooped or theirs.

10 TRUTHS WHITE AND LATIN PEOPLE KNOW, BUT BLACK PEOPLE WON'T ADMIT:

1. Tupac is dead.
2. Crown Royal bags are meant to be thrown away.
3. Having a ring on every finger is too much.
4. O.J. did it
5. Teeth should not be decorated.
6. Breaks are usually only 15 minutes.
7. Jesse Jackson will never be President.
8. RED is not a kool-aid flavor (it's a color).
9. Your rims and sound system should not be worth more than your car.
10. Your pastor doesn't know everything

Virtual Bartender 2!!!

I couldn't seem to find anywhere to order some of this...

so instead I'll present the next best thing I could find in the medicine cabinet.

I just came across this "sequel" to the original Virtual Bartender from Beer.com that I posted about a while back. Now you get TWO beautiful bartenders for the price of one...er, none? Anyway, enjoy!

Beer Bartender Babes Interactive Virtual Bartender Sexy McBoozo Nancy Drew?

Biblical Activity Book...the Bible, for Real!

An all too literal take on biblical scripture...Hilarious!

"the first in our series of activity books, the old testament edition, is complete. we are very proud to offer you these 15 pages as a free download, including 5 pages to color, a maze, a rebus story, a mad-lib, a “find the hidden picture,” a word search, and fun do-it-yourself project (answers included for your young ones.)" "all content is drawn directly from the old testament so it is safe, educational, and hopefully will provide good clean fun the whole family can enjoy!"

Religion Funny Satire Activity Coloring McBoozo

Updated: My Sharapova!

Well, it looks like the link for the My Sharapova spoof was redirected, most likely from the traffic. I've updated the post and it should now direct you to the correct link. Sorry about the confusion!

(This post also links to the new spot for your convenience)

Mr. Roboto

Man, this is just too much fun!!! Rhetorical rVoice is a professional speech synthesis system - they build voices for artificial call centres and the like. Their demo page is perfect for making hilarious crank calls to your friends & family. Give it a shot on their demo page!

Jokes Humor Funny Pranks Robots Hardy Boys? Japan Synthesizer

Best site ever???

If you're lucky enough to catch this post in the very near future then check out this site!!!

Cartoon Fridge (Quite possibly the best site ever?)

This site is going to be yanked down before you can blink but enjoy it while it lasts!!!

Finally, another poem!!!

As I gobble my pretzels

(Photo is © 2002 Wendy Cook)

and pop some Aleve...


I still feel the remnants


of the buzz I achieved.


(Wait, or is it this buzz?)



Just like old times,

22's were-a-flowin'
After three games of shuffleboard

My buzz started showin'.


My boy and I used to
slam beers all the time,

but now there are far less
excuses for rhyme...


It appears that the days of Frankie's and Drake's
Are soon to be things of the past...
and nights at Joe D's that result in my hand
winding up in an elbow-high cast!

Random Link 'o The Day: A Great Beer Blog!!!

Drinking Poetry Bush W Buzz Aldrin Disney ? McBoozo Shuffleboard Dumars Pistons Aleve Whiskey Simpsons

My Sharapova!

A Funny Happy Birthday tribute to Maria Sharapova!
(Click on picture!)
(Oh yeah, I know you're an Anna K. person but this one's still for you J!)

(Photo from ESPN's Page2)

LYRICS TO "MY SHARAPOVA"
Ooh, my little pretty one, pretty one.
When you gonna serve it to me, Sharapova?

Ooh, you make this volley fun, volley fun.
Chalk is flyin' all around, Sharapova!

Never gonna stop.
Lob it up.
Such a stunning joy.
I'm gonna live it up.
Can I be your ball boy?

My, my, my, I yi – Whoo!
Sh-sh-sh-sharapova.

I buy all your posters, hun, posters, hun.
Plastering my bedroom walls, Sharapova!
You'll go down in history, in history.
As a champion unlike Kournikova!

Never gonna stop.
Lob it up.
I'm a big fan
I wanna live it up.
As you win the Grand Slam.

My, my, my, I yi – Whoo!
Sh-sh-sh-sharapova.
Sh-sh-sh-sharapova.
Sh-sh-sh-sharapova.
Sh-sh-sh-sharapova.

Spoof Tennis Sharapova Babe Funny Page2 ESPN Sports The Knack

Transformers...Zoom Zoom!

This is obviously from some time last year but I just came across it for the 1st time and thought it was pretty amusing. I used to have tons of Transformers when I was a kid...wonder what ever happened to all those toys? Probably sold them all in a garage sale or something (kind of like all my He-Man figures...Damn!!!)

(More than meets the eye!)

Transformers Desktop Wallpapers!

(Click picture below)

Original Transformers: The Movie Trailer

(File is approx. 17mb & requires Quicktime)

Mazda RX-8 Transformers Optimus Prime Toys Retro 80's Cartoons Animation

Choose your own Adventure

Everybody remembers the old "Choose Your Own Adventure" series of books right? I have some pretty fond memories of wasting time reading these crappy books only to find that all of the endings sucked! Well, I guess that I never realized how tripped out the cover art on some these was until I saw this on SomethingAwful...

and

There's plenty more here!

Books SomethingAwful Humor Chooseyourownadventure Satire McBoozo

Feedback

Hey everyone,
I've been doing some tweaking on the site appearance the last few days & I'm curious to hear what everyone thinks. If you've got some suggestions please comment. If you like what I've done with the place let me know. If you preferred it the way it was before, just tell me. If you really don't give a flying rat's ass...let me know! Sorry the posts have been so erratic. I've been putting in a lot of extra hours at work and my wife & I started tearing apart our kitchen for some much needed "refreshing", all of which leaves less time to scour the net for fantabulous finds and such. Hopefully I'll get time to scan in more things from my sketchbooks, post more mp3's from my eclectic collection, and color the world with my half-melted box of Crayola's! In the meantime, stay out of trouble and watch for smokey's hiding in the bush & behind overpasses. Seacrest...I'm out.

A little spring cleaning...

Just doing a little redesign, if things look screwed up I'm probably tweaking the live code. Come back later and everything should be alright! Thanks for your patience.

Rick James...Beeotch!

Random stops along the MP3 Wagon Trail

Well folks, here's today's random selections from the ol' wagon trail...enjoy!

• Feels Like Rain - Buddy Guy & Bonnie Raitt

It's your time now, baby, but it'll be mine after a while"-so the song goes, and it couldn't ring any truer than it must for veteran Chicago bluesman Buddy Guy. After years of never quite capturing his frenzied blues intensity and wild showmanship on wax, Guy experienced a breakthrough two years ago with his Grammy-winning comeback LP Damn Right I've Got The Blues. Although it seems like ever since then the media's been trying to shove him onto that "Elder Statesman Of The Blues" pedestal, the cat doesn't look a day over 30, and plays like he's a hungry 19-year-old with no tomorrow. Produced by John Porter (who also did Damn Right), Feels Like Rain once again features an all-star band-including Richie Hayward and Bill Payne of Little Feat along with cameos from Bonnie Raitt, Paul Rodgers, John Mayall (on the excellent "I Could Cry") and Travis Tritt.

• Five Owls - Canned Heat

Five Owls is only a portion of the nine minute epic Parthenogenesis from the seminal Living the Blues album released by Canned Heat in 1968. The quintet of Alan "Blind Owl" Wilson (guitar/vocals), Larry "The Mole" Taylor (bass), Henry "Sunflower" Vestine (guitar), Aldolfo "Fido" Dela Parra (drums), and Bob "The Bear" Hite (vocals) return with the same aggressive blend of amplified rock with rhythm and blues as their previous hit LP Boogie with Canned Heat. The sidelong, "Parthenogenesis" is an experimental suite that allows each band member copious room to move.

• Urgent - Foreigner

Foreigner released their fourth album simply called Foreigner 4 in late June of 1981. The album was the band's first since 1979's Platinum seller Head Games. Head Games while a Platinum seller, did not sell as well as the first two albums and founding members Al Greenwood and Ian McDonald quit over creative and personal differences. Instead of breaking up,lead singer Lou Gramm, guitarist Mick Jones, drummer Dennis Elliot and bass player Rick Wills forged ahead with Mick and AC/DC and Def Leppard producer now Shania Twain's husband Mutt Lange co-producing and unleashed Foreigner's most successful album ever with Foreigner 4. The album was #1 for ten straight weeks and sold millions thanks to the massive Top 5 hits Urgent(with Jr Walker's sax solo) and the ballad Waiting For a Girl Like You. Also, the album contained rock radio classics like Juke Box Hero, I'm Gonna Win and the opening Night Life.

• Luna - The Smashing Pumpkins
  

Siamese Dream was The Smashing Pumpkins' breakthrough album, spawning a few modern rock mainstays and even a crossover pop hit. The production here is given a "Wall of Sound" treatment. The songs are wrapped in layers of noisy guitars, creating a dense, dreamy sound. There's also a heavy emphasis on melodies and hooks. Luna is a gorgeous, Middle Eastern-tinged ballad, a soft masterpiece with great use of mellotron providing the album with a nice, quiet closing.

If you enjoy these artist's give'em your support & buy the CD's!

Music MP3 Blues Rock Tunes Blog Oregon Trail Games PC Retro Vintage Buddy Guy Canned Heat Foreigner Smashing Pumpkins

Syndication!

Just in case you haven't noticed, I've added syndication to McBoozo's Drunken Poetry Jam finally! Tired of checking back randomly, wondering if there's been any new posts to the site? Well, join a syndication service and get notified every time a new post is added! Track all of your favorite blogs! I've been using Bloglines lately and it's great! I totally recommend this for everyone. To subscribe to McBoozo's Drunken Poetry Jam just click one of the icons in the sidebar listed under Syndication, or click here to join bloglines and subscribe.

The Poetry Month/Twinkie Birthday Poetry Contest

Hey everyone,
Sorry it's been so long since the last update. I've been super tied up with work and have been unable to find the time for the blog. That being said, I've got an extra bonus packed post for everyone today, enjoy!

In association with

The Poetry Month/Twinkie Birthday Poetry Contest

"Today marks the 75th birthday of the Twinkie.
I was once called un-American because I hate Twinkies. Not only is the filling much too sweet, it also has a granulated feel to it that makes me feel like I'm eating dirt. I don't like the sponge cake, either. Feels too much like real sponge.
But far be it from me to stand in the way of a birthday celebration for a beloved snack cake. I thought I'd combine National Poetry Month with the birthday of Twinkies in one delicious contest. That's right. Twinkie Poetry.
The rules are pretty open:

• Almost any form is acceptable - limerick, haiku, free verse, couplets, anything but epic poetry. Please, no Odyssey as done by Twinkies and other Hostess products.
• Enter in the comments. No email entries accepted.
• The subject matter is wide open. As long as it has to do with Twinkies, I don't care if it's an ode, a love poem, a hate poem, a recipe in rhyme or a limerick about what you do with your frozen Twinkies when no one is looking. Parodies of well known poems/lyrics also acceptable.
• You can enter as many times as you like, but each entry must go in a separate comment.
• Contest remains open until some time this evening, subject to change without notice, depending on how many entries I get.
• I will not judge. A judge's panel will be formed. If you don't want to enter the contest, but want to be a judge, email me. It helps if you have expertise in the Twinkie and/or poetry areas.
  

There is a prize this time. Winner will receive in the mail one box of Twinkies, of course."

McBoozo's Drunken Poetry Jam is also contributing a Twinkies bumper sticker to the winner as well!

Enjoy this contest courtesy of Michelle at A Small Victory!

Well, I've finally broken down and started to rip my entire CD collection into my home compruter. The eventual plan is to purchase a streaming media box to allow me to play all of the files on my home stereo. I've got over 1,000 cd's covering just about every genre of music you can imagine. As a special bonus I'll be posting random tracks (in .mp3 format) for your listening pleasure on a daily basis. I'll keep the songs available for download for approx. 2-3 weeks. I hope you'll enjoy them! Here's a couple to get today started followed by a couple fun links. Sorry again about the last week of non-posting...I promise it'll never happen again! Oh, and also found below is my contribution to the Poetry Month/Twinkie Birthday!

MP3's:

Waitin' for the Bus - ZZ Top

Mother - Danzig

Locomotive Breath - Jethro Tull

Mahna Mahna - Cake (This song just absolutely rocks, The Muppet Show ruled!)

(To save these files Right Click on link and select Save Target As...)

Random Links '0 the Day:

Columbia University's Music Lab Project

Music Lab is a research project conducted by scientists from Columbia University to learn about how people form opinions about music. If you participate in Music Lab you will have a chance to download free new music.

The Ric Flair Experience!

Considered by most as being the greatest professional wrestling star of all time, Richard Morgan Fliehr has combined his superior wrestling skills with an unmatched desire and unparalleled arrogance to create the greatest show on earth - the "Nature Boy" Ric Flair. [This site is just too funny, I've been saving it for a while now to share with everyone!!!]

My Twinkie Poem

The golden exterior, it calls out my name

No other snack cake tastes quite the same

The delightful creme filling, it takes me away

As I take my first bite I dance and I sway

My vision goes blurry, my tastebuds they melt

My blood sugar rises as I loosen my belt!

I shake and I tremble as I go back for more

These sweet little treats that I simply adore!

Originally named for the twinkle toe shoe

They switched to creme filling during World War II

You see they used filling that was made from bananas

Good ol' Twinkie the Kid even sports a bandana

At only a hundred and fifty calories apiece

It would take quite a few to become rather obese

Five hundred million are baked every year

But my box is now empty it would seem to appear!

Twinkie Poetry Blog A Small Victory Contest MP3 Music Humor Huh? McBoozo Download But Seriously?