“The intermediate stage between socialism and capitalism is alcoholism.”
I was born a small circus clown in the upper midwest U.S. It was a cold, windy night and my mother's tentacles kept me from freezing to death, fortunately my father was a pygmy eskimo so it was in my blood to survive nights like these! I didn't get to spend much time with my parents as a child, for I was abducted by a clan of intergalactic space monkeys (dressed like Elvis impersonators too) and forced into a life of driving tiny cars, wearing flowers that squirted people, and doing things that really hurt me but kept the audience laughing. Eventually I was able to escape and fight my way past the guards using a sharpened toothpick (the ones they had were pretty dull). Anyway, I found my way back home, joined the circus here on earth, it was all I knew, and started drinking heavily. If you want to know more just e-mail me!
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